The now ex boyfriend had been raping the Redditor in their sleep after they took their prescribed Ambien.
Trigger Warning: This article contains details of sexual abuse that may be distressing to readers.
A Redditor is sharing their story on the platform of how they were raped by their now ex-boyfriend. What's shocking is that the boyfriend admitted to doing it over 30 times. The Redditor is now seeking out support after sharing the heartbreaking incident. They wrote: Im not sure what I’m looking for here, but my ex-boyfriend told me he’s been raping me in my sleep after I took Ambien and it’s happened over 30 times according to him. Then on Monday he violently sexually assaulted me early in the morning while we just woke up for the day. I’ve been granted a restraining order and am pressing legal criminal charges so I’m not looking for advice because I’m taking all the steps. I'm talking to RAINN, I have a counselor and therapist, and a wonderful family. I just can’t stop crying. I am afraid to close my eyes. I feel so absolutely violated and extremely confused. Anyways, has anyone else been in this situation? How do I move on? Im so upset. Im having memories flood back of past times he’s raped me and it’s just awful. I literally feel like I blocked out full memories. I think I just need internet hugs. EDIT: I FORGOT A HUGE DETAIL. I went on his found and found a photo he took of me while I was sound asleep and he’s touching himself. I have the picture and have ALREADY given it to the police.
No person deserves to be manipulated or taken advantage of. When it comes to sex, consent is the most important conversation to have. If a partner is asleep, how can they give consent? Consent involves verbal and affirmative expression. RAINN (Rape, Abuse & Incest National Network) is the country's largest anti-sexual violence organization. According to their website: Consent is an agreement between participants to engage in sexual activity. Consent should be clearly and freely communicated. A verbal and affirmative expression of consent can help both you and your partner to understand and respect each other’s boundaries. Consent cannot be given by individuals who are underage, intoxicated or incapacitated by drugs or alcohol, or asleep or unconscious.
The Redditor's story touched many other Internet users who came out to offer support to the distraught survivor. One person said: I don't think I can really offer any helpful advice. But rest assured you are doing all the right things for all the right reasons. You must have a lot of emotional resilience to have gotten this far. I know it doesn't mean much coming from a random internet stranger, but I'm proud of you. Seriously. You're going through one of the most hellish experiences a human can have, and you're handling it like a champ. Don't be afraid to take breaks and reward yourself, because you deserve them.
Another added: I'm so sorry that this happened to you. It's not really the same thing but my ex would complain until I gave in which I found out is also a form of rape. The reason I gave in as well as because he always made it clear that if I said no he was going to beat the hell out of me or not let me sleep until I did. He literally said, I don't care what you want. You're not sleeping until you give me what I want. Once, after beating the hell out of me for almost 48 hours straight, he pushed me over to his bed and started to have sex with me. I was too terrified to say no so I just took it. He heard me crying and stopped. We went outside and he kept saying over and over, I raped you, I raped you. Of course I said no you didn't but I knew in the back of my head that he did. I was told by the RAIIN Network that it was rape. It's hard to come to terms with the fact that somebody you thought you could trust and who you thought loved you could hurt you in such a way. I'm sorry again, big hugs.
If you are being subjected to sexual assault, or know of anyone who is, please call the National Sexual Assault Hotline at 800.656.HOPE (4673)