Valerie Sanders just wanted her husband to help her around the house, however, the poor lady was arrested and jailed for asking her husband to share the burdens of her household work.
Married life is not a bed of roses. There are responsibilities and compromises along with the numerous romantic dates and kisses. Running errands and helping each other with household chores are all part of marriage. Sometimes these may lead to disagreements and arguments but a 58-year-old woman experienced some serious consequences for asking a helping hand from her partner.
According to Metro UK, Valerie Sanders asked her 58-year-old bodybuilder husband to help her with some household chores. She asked him to vacuum, clean the patio and reduce the time at the gym. The wife, however, was not expecting to be charged for controlling behavior and spending time in prison.
"I’d leave a note asking him to vacuum parts of the house and clean the patio doors. We have two miniature dachshunds. But he would spend four hours cleaning his car – so of course, I complained," said Valerie quoted Mirror Online. She also told how her husband's gym routine had disrupted their relationship and marriage. "He was training all the time. He was eating five or six meals a day and mushing up all his food in the blender. We stopped going out for meals. I was working and he was at the gym from early in the morning until late at night," said the wife to DailyStar.
"I just didn’t see him. He started to do bodybuilding competitions. It wasn't attractive. It was like cuddling an ironing board. He started to take Viagra, blaming the steroids. But when he took the tablets it made him sniffy and snotty so I refused to sleep with him," said Valerie.
Valerie who was unhappy with the way her marriage was going wanted to put things in order. However, she ended up spending 17 hours in prison and was charged with controlling behavior after her husband made some statements to the Jobcentre staff. In 2018, Michael Sanders told the staff during a routine check at his job that he felt low and complained that his life at home caused him sadness. The following day, Valerie was arrested based on a law that is meant to protect vulnerable women.
"These laws were brought in to help protect vulnerable people who are suffering in relationships - not to prosecute nagging wives. It’s outrageous it ever got to court," said Valerie to the Sun. She also added that giving notes to her husband cannot be regarded as controlling behavior. "Surely it isn’t controlling behavior, otherwise every married couple would be in court?" said Valerie.
The mother of two called her charges "outrageous" and said that she was "treated like a criminal" for asking her husband to help around the house. The court which took about 14 months to review the case, finally dropped the case without a trial. However, the lady was given a two-year restraining order.
She said that more than the restraining order it was the jail time which made her lose her love for her husband. "17 hours in a prison cell broke my love for him. It’s such a relief it is all over," said Valerie.
Michael also had his side of the story. "I’m not sure if she should have gone to court or not. That was not my decision – but she was controlling. She was constantly on at me," said Michael. The couple who met online in 2012 got married in 2014. Michael told Daily Mail that he developed suicidal thoughts and depression just six months into the marriage. He said he could not cope up with the constant nagging.
The case has now resulted in the divorce of the couple.